Archive for May, 2013


It takes a lot to be a homeless person. But first of all, I would like to say that this is not such a bad idea. The reason I say this is, to beg on the streets, actually earns you a quite good income. What do I mean by good income? Well it goes something like this. People give more to homeless people, than what an average Joe Blue or white collar citizen thinks the homeless person would earn.

 I moved from LA to Arizona like I mentioned before in my last blog entry. This happened when I became homeless. But then I started to think about my Television show Called “Heartache.” As I thought of this show that was making me so much money, I thought about moving back to my true home which is where I’m located now. I’m now in Los Angeles. City of angels.

One would think I’m crazy, but, it felt good to be a celebrity and have all the riches I want.

The deal is when two more days pass my Television show is going to do a documentary on how homeless people get by. This will hopefully get my foot back in the door of the entertainment industry, after being off it for so long due to my drugs. I’m so excited to do this and get the show on the road.

(Two and a half days later.)

Camera Crew: “Someone get this guy some water! It is hot out today; we don’t want this guy passing out while we’re filming. Hurry up!” The one big dude yelled this with intensity and in a big rush to get this segment of the show shot as soon as they could.

Me: I started to yell at one crew member as he did not stop putting make-up on me. “Would you get on with what else you have to do!” I felt power flow through my veins, as I roared in his presence.

The crew member started to pick up speed on his task, but I slapped his hand back to make sure he knew my hint to let him know I didn’t want to be played with anymore. But when I slapped his hand away, the make-up artist, or the annoying crew member, looked at me and he moved his jaw back and forth in his circular repeated fashion and looked deep into my eyes with his squinted eyes. He picked up his baggage off the ground full of dirt. He then proceeds to spit a glob of guck.

Production leader: “Everyone get into your places. Action!” He had done this repeatedly about every half hour of filming me. As I take people’s money from on the highway.

But the thing that sucks about this first episode, is, I need drug money now. The Production leader said I would not be receiving any money for this episode, since he is starting me all over. My drug problem never went away even after drug rehab in Arizona.

Signing Out:                                                   ROBERT                                                       

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When I lived in my spacious six bedroom house, I lived the life. With the drug problem I have now, it has forced me into staying in the homeless shelter. Drugs are bad for you kids. All they will do for you is leave you  on a string, then one day it will cut you off from what you are doing.

I guess you might be asking what I’m doing to keep busy at the homeless shelter. It is as simple as this. I’m taking my time, which I have a lot of, and searching through garbage cans all day. Yes it is a lot of hard work that requires a lot of labor.

I’m still trying to get back into the drug rehab program, but it is hard to get in without any money, or at least not enough money.  Also besides all of this, on a side note, my television show is to come to shoot some film with me being homeless and all.

I guess this is okay with me as long as I can get back into a home, preferably rehab. Rehab is the heart of what needs to happen. I’m so hard core into drugs right now, I will buy drugs over food with my money.

Not to mention, I have moved to Arizona, so I don’t get so cold at night, because I ‘m on the streets. This will hopefully help.

Arizona gets so hot in the summer. I have been here for a month now, and the shade is barely helping me with my dehydration. Yes I’m always getting very dehydrated, mostly during the dreaded day. But the good thing about being here is I don’t need to worry about the night being so cold.

The hitch hike to Arizona was kind of scary. I was scared that some nut head could have killed me, but luckily didn’t.

This is how you live when you are homeless. I hope that all of you have learned how bad drugs are, and how dreaded your life becomes after you turn to drugs for the thrill in your life or whatever you do it for.  DON’T DO DRUGS!

Signing Out:                                               Robert

The last thing I want to do; is worry about how I’m going to pay my next bill. I still have drug problems, and even though this Television show is bringing revenue in like crazy, I’m spending more than I bring in.

The other day, I received a notice from the bank telling me, if I don’t pay the bills, I will lose my house. Yes. My house is going to be ripped from underneath me and I will be left for dead.

What I mean by being left for dead is; I will have to live out on the barren streets. I say barren because there are not many poor people in my neighborhood. I guess I will get the homeless shelter all to myself.

 It makes me feel so sad inside, because I will be one of the only poor persons in my city.

(Sigh) This is not what is supposed to happen. I will not let this go down in vain.

My drug problem is going to be the death of me. Not literally, but it is something that I will have to carry the burden of. I’ve tried to get help, but every time I come out from beneath the roof of the drug rehab, I relapse hard. This happens when I start to party.

The partying in my life has to stop. Even though my bros before hoes(Homies), egg me on to party, I must not give in to peer pressure.

But to say that I will not give in to peer pressure is more hard done than said.

Sometimes I always wondered what people mean when they would say, “It’s Harder done than said.” But now I get what they were trying to say. The message means this. Anything hard that one does, that same person,” Which is me at the moment” needs to take a step back and listen to what one self is saying.

I need to step back, and study what it means to stop. I don’t think I have a good enough grasp of what I need to do to stop. If I don’t know what it means to stop, then I will determine my own fate.

Signing out:                                                          Robert